When Oliver left home at 18, it wasn’t an act of teenage rebellion, it was a desperate bid for survival.
Oliver had known from a young age that he was gay, but when, aged 14, he found the courage to tell his family and community, they turned on him. At 18, no longer safe at home, he packed what he could – including his childhood teddies – and left.
He dreamed of being a writer and was accepted onto a Creative Writing degree. But losing all he’d grown up with nearly broke him. “I was barely hanging on,” he says.
Then, a lifeline: a university therapist handed him a list of organisations. That’s how he found Depaul UK.
“I told them how scared I was about money,” he says. “That’s when they told me about a grant.” With guidance from Joss, Depaul UK’s Programmes Manager, Oliver applied. “She didn’t just help with the paperwork; Joss made me feel like I mattered. She gave me hope.”
It changed his life. The grant meant Oliver could stay at university, covering his tuition and accommodation and giving him the stability he needed to focus on his studies. “I graduated with a First. I came top of my class,” he says, with quiet pride.
But academic success was only one part of the story. To truly move forward, Oliver needed to face what he’d been through – and that’s where Alison came in. Alison is Depaul UK’s Money Management Coordinator. But what she offers goes far beyond spreadsheets.
“She said to me:
‘You can’t fix your finances until you face your trauma. No one had ever connected those things before.”
This wasn’t by chance – it was trauma-informed practice in action: a care approach that acknowledges the impact of trauma on individuals. Instead of just seeing financial instability as a lack of budgeting skills, it recognises that past traumatic experiences can deeply influence a person’s relationship with money, affecting their ability to make consistent decisions or plan for the future.
By addressing the underlying trauma, Alison helped Oliver process the emotional and psychological barriers that were impacting his financial well-being – enabling him to build a stable foundation that went beyond just managing numbers. With Alison’s help, Oliver not only managed his money, but also rebuilt his confidence.
Now, Oliver is living his dream. He’s an artist in residence and is shaping the future not just for himself, but for others. In his role as a Client Rep, he is part of a Depaul UK research project, working to understand how homelessness services can better support LGBTQ+ young people.
He’s directly helping to shape the research – advising on questions and interviewing techniques. The project delves into why and how LGBTQ+ young people experience homelessness. Through his involvement, Oliver is helping us gain a deeper understanding of where the system falls short, and how it can be genuinely transformed.
Oliver now says:
“I would tell my scared 14-year-old self – you will find people who feed you, house you, support you – not because they have to, but because they care.”